Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Realization

Congratulations to Ms. Shamcey Supsup for being the 3rd runner-up in the recent Miss Universe 2011!!! Her answer was great and it was true to her beliefs. She proved to everyone her goodness and firm belief by her answer and to tell you the truth, I was thinking of the exact opposite way back in college. Let me fill you in with that one…

I have this HUGE crush towards this guy for about 5 years now and he’s super kind, gets along well with everybody, cracks good jokes; basically he’s this boy next door that you’d want to be with. All the girls love him. We don’t talk which is a total bummer. I really thought that we could be friends by the time that we reach our second year in college owing to the fact that some of my closest friends became his classmates as well. But it never really happened.


During our second semester in first year, I shifted to another course (from Information Technology to Information Management; both in the same division—Computer Studies) so my original classmates became his friends and basically that whole shuffling of students from different course made a big impact. Consequently, it allowed us to meet other people from our division. For instance, I made good friends with the Computer Science (CS) people since we’re classmates on our minor subjects such as Theology, Philosophy, Psychology, and etc. For about 3 years, they became our “minor buddies” and it was fun. Most of the IT students became my friends and I could say that I’m in I’ll-smile-when-I-see-you mode with them…but not him.

One time, V and I were walking along the corridor of our home floor when we saw Nips (that’s our code for him :P). V and Nips said hi to each other and they talked for about 30 seconds and when they said their I’ll-see-you-around parting words, V asked me why I didn’t talk. And so I said that I’m in awe with guy since first year and we never really became friends for some reason. It was a total shocker to V since he’s friends with everyone except me and she just assumed that we’re friends since I’m friends with he’s pals (was that a bit confusing?). Uh, this guy has this group of friends and his friends and I are on speaking terms so it was a bit unusual to V to find us not talking to each other. And she had no idea about it, not till that day.

All of my friends knew that I fancy him. I got a bit annoyed with E one time when she kept asking Nips if he knew me and every time they would talk, E would say that I said hi to him—which was totally UNTRUE. Not that I don’t want to but I just don’t want to sound desperate.

We never really talk except that time when he asked if I’ve seen L. It was the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me that day. Heart jumping, I said something gibberish that sounded like, “No, I didn’t see him.” He said, “Thank you” and I murmured a word resembling to, “OK.” Then I turned around and smiled my widest that could have been a potential cause of the first and unique case of face malfunction due to unnaturally excessive tension in the mouth. It has the possibility of being called blissfully intoxicating and gigantic admiration or in the simplest term: BIGA XD

I don’t know what’s gotten into me that time but I started to not eat pork (their religion does not allow them to eat anything that has pork on it). My friends would ask me the biggest IF. It has something to do with: What happens if somewhere along the way you would end up together, would I be willing to change my religion for him? And I would automatically say yes without really thinking it through. I had this belief that it doesn’t really matter who you believe in but how you do your part in your society and as long as you don’t do anything bad. But as time goes on, I actually changed towards that kind of thinking. As the verse in Titus 3:5 says, “Not by works of righteous which we have done, but according to his mercy He saves us…”

Then later on, I’ve learned that he likes E and she told me about some of the things that he told her and I felt really jealous even though I was in a relationship that time. I also concluded that I’m not his type. He likes pretty girls so… I’m talking too much, am I not? :P What I’m trying to say is that, Shamcey’s answer affirmed and solidifies my decision and sealed my long hesitation about my religion. I may not be religious but I will never change my religion just because it doesn’t fit with my future husband’s standards. If our love for each other encompasses our differences, then it’ll make our love go stronger and I could probably say from that moment on that what we feel is TRUE LOVE.

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