One of the things that I’m thankful for this year is the opportunity to share some of my thoughts to my dad. I didn’t grow up talking that much to him. As a matter of fact, I grew up hating him. Well, not all the time. We just didn’t have that chemistry as most fathers and daughters have. It’s funny talking about chemistry when it should be an instant thing, it should come natural as he is a family, my father. I dunno.
So anyway, yeah… Maybe I didn’t realized how much he sacrificed for us, for me. Or maybe so, I wasn’t that sensitive enough to realize those things. Somehow, I could say that maturity contributed much to this realization. And I’m thankful that even during those days of chaos, he still supported and loved me. As much as I have declared to the whole world and affirmed to myself again and again that I don’t love him, I now do. I now see how he raised me and siblings with the best of his ability. He supported us throughout my college years. He became a father and a mother at the same time. It wasn’t easy for all of us. There were times that I would not go home because I hated him so much and that I can’t stomach seeing him. I would call rarely and send messages to him once a week or so. Those are some of the things that I regretted. I wasn’t considerate enough and so I didn’t exert an effort to know him better.
I’m 22 and I still (sometimes) act childish. I’m not proud of it. But I know that every realization is an opportunity to learn and grow. So why did I write a blog post regarding my father? I guess to honor him…for the great things that he did just so we can have a bright future ahead of us. And I’m proud to say that I’m not giving him a hard time for the past 3 months (except borrowing money). :P
I truly believe that everything will fall into their proper places. He is a good parent. Not perfect but a father that I can be proud of.