Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Second Chance

One week. That all it takes for me to get THREE bloody proposals. One was a yes, the other two—ignored and ditched. I find it hard to be in this kind of situation because I feel somewhat responsible for their actions… (As I was typing this post, I was carefully choosing my words as people might get upset over it)

Although it made me confused still, I have made my decision. And I want to stick to it. I REALLY DO. Emotions… It’s something that you can’t control no matter how hard you try. And I… do not know if this is correct but I’m taking the plunge…the risk, the danger of the so-called second chance. Where this will lead me? I have no idea. I do not want to screw this up. Are we on the same page? I’m not sure. I’m a little bit unprepared for this one. Although I said that I am more ready this time around, I’m not sure if we are on the same level of emotions.

Undergoing through this tough week, I realized a lot of things. One: People do hurtful things to each other not knowing that at the end of the day, when everything’s gone, there’s no going back. We do stupid things thinking nothing’s going to change, that everything will still be the same after we fucked up, but once you get burned so much, you’re just too sore to even bother. You feel sorry for them, true. But they had their chances (with a big S, mind you) and sadly, they blew it. Two: Commitment is important in every aspect of life, but the conviction to stay committed is a whole different story. I feel like every day is a constant battle to be faithful. And I’m really trying my hardest. I think I have not broken my promise yet but this is getting tough. Third: Grab every chance you got. We can only get insured in a life plan, but never in another’s heart.  Ok, I’m getting sentimental and this is getting creeeeepy. The mere mention of heart is like a horror film waiting to explode. HAHAHA!

I’m just hoping that I made the right decision. Yikes! I don’t want to get stuck in a situation I don’t want to be in. We’ll see…

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